I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
It's end St Patricks day. I'm gonna need a leash. And a bib. And a rain check on anything considered dignifying.
Well be careful man. Be careful. Wear shoes in the house. Safety. Safety first, then teamwork.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
My dad sent me a 10 ft beer bong and my mom sent me ideas for future careers. I'll let you guess who my favorite parent is. Also, come over tonight. and bring beers.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Our sub is singing "i believe i can fly" after yelling at the class this whole time and this is really hella weird
I am a delicate flower. A fucked up, drunk, horny, pants pissing, delicate little flower.
We didn't have a place to have sex. So we timed the automatic car wash & spent $9 for 3 minutes and 45 secs of car sex.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
I JUST SNEEZED WITH A MOUTHFUL OF CHEWED UP CASHEWS AND THEY CAME OUT MY NOSE AND IT HURT AND NOW I HAVE A LITTLE NOSEBLEED
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