I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
You should be grateful to be my roommate. My booty calls always drive you places in the morning.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
I'm pretty sure that I'm earning a horrible reputation with your friends, but I'm having a fucking great time in the process.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
His lack of social graces and moral fiber complements mine nicely.
I feel like I should go door-to-door apologizing to America.
But now I'm just thinking when he said he "worked for the airline" he actually meant drug smuggling.
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
They are like the regular squirrels and we are flying squirrels
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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