my room smells like sperm. sweet.
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Her boobs looked like leather oven mitts. No more cougar hunting for awhile.
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
how sketchy is it to eat a candy wrapped in masking tape from reggae night? because we totally just split it...
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
There's literally not a single picture of him with a shirt on. I can't talk to him without dislocating my eye balls.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
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