Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
Is this the 6 foot tall blonde I screwed in the bar last weekend?
In the bar?! Very impressive! But keep guessing!
My roommate is watching gummy bears "race" from a mega-marshmallow to his lava lamp.
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
I think I just pulled an onion peel off my boob from sleeping on their kitchen floor
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
The NSA quit spying on phones. I'm sending you SO MANY dick pics.
Anyway, all that to say that tiny penises are a hassle.
As much as my throat was opened up this weekend, you'd think I wouldn't nearly choke on a damn almond.
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