the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
its like national bring your ginger to the pool day or something
At this point I feel like i'm never going to be sober, and it's frightening
OH MY GOD. JESUS STRIPPER. THERE IS A JESUS STRIPPER HERE. A STRIPPER DRESSED AS JESUS.
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
There is a 15" subwoofer mounted inside our fridge. I've never been more proud of myself.
Maybe we could get a groupon for vasectomy. I'm game.
didn't realize her mom was home while we were fucking, but she's oddly okay with it. she made us food afterwards. but then kept talking about having grand kids the whole time. is it time to bail?
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
Randomize
