why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
either she said she was feeling frisky or eating friskies..i was too drunk to understand.
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
I can't believe we just used the phrase "jizz to juice ratio" in casual conversation.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
at the hospital. the stripper fell on his face when she was trying to grab the dollar bill out of his mouth with her ass. broken nose for sure.
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
One of the guys just came in and goes "i walked all the way home with a pumpkin". Night just got better.
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
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