I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
New low. I just threw up in the shower at 4pm. Nothing like leaving behind my 20s with class.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
