I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
I sent him a picture of my touching myself. He responded back "Your nails look really nice"
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
That's what happens when you park you car under a perfectly good balchony I can puke off of
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I'll just tell your children you were the queen of drunk town and you had a giant purple monkey named bongo
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
I made out with a dude last night who has an ex wife. Is this what post grad life is about?
Can I join you for some emotional "Post: The Ohio State University's first lose in football after a 24 game winning streak" sex?
Didn't you used to babysit him?
18 years ago I helped him into his clothes. Today he helped me out of mine.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
