She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
About to trim my pubes so if you decide to walk in, viewer discretion is advised.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
I want to wait until after I get laid before I ask him his political affiliation. Just in case. I'm so desperate I would bang a Republican
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Randomize
