Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
We're hooking up, I have a toothbrush at her place, and yet on leaving her apartment a minute ago we said goodbye with a hi five. WTF?
You're upset about this?
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
just heard a glass bottle fall in lecture and my first thought was to yell party foul.....is it friday yet?
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
I guess I could probably fit that in between deep self reflection and teenage mutant ninja turtles
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Sorry. My phone died in the middle of you explaining why we would never work as a couple. Whatever you were gonna say, I probably agree.
Don't shower too much, need the shame to be fresh to get the best story
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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