I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I'm basically sure i was the reason for glitter on his penis
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
So it turns out rose was the bear hunting girl. Fuck my life
None of those words made sense together.
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
I'd bet your vomit would be flammable at this point. Can I try to light it?
We wouldn't be friends if you didn't.
My love will cover her like lulu lemon yoga pants. Casually supportive and always complimenting your Ass.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
They took my balls.
Again? Most people check out of hotels, they don't escape from them
I can't help but look at my sex life and acknowledge that this is not normal behavior.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
You added his wife on Facebook?! You're horrible at this mistress thing
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