Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Oh and you pulled your pants down outside in front of like five people, held my hand, then peed.
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Yea i think drunk-me kept all my bar receipts, just to throw it in sober-me's face.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
yeah the cable guy is coming and everybody is hiding all the pieces in the house. we are up to thirty two. like a fun game of smokable scavener hunt.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
You kept sacrificing me last night. You would just yell out "Virgin Sacrifice!!" and then throw me into a circle of men.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
Randomize
