at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
But the ghost of his schlong past haunts you
This is my transition from small talk texts to booty call texts. Coming over?
Quite the smooth talker. There in 5.
Ohh I see how it works, eat pussy and I get Reese's pieces.
So yes we had an orgy last night and I sucked your tits while you fucked my husband but I am weird about sharing my toothbrush.
I'm sorry that running around town like a frenetic wombat trying to find you KY jelly isn't good enough for you.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
she squeaked mid orgaism. I laughed she cried
Randomize
