....ANDDD I just became confused during sexting and sent my mother a text describing a "porno-worthy cum shot."
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
let's get a trip to cabo together for next spring... they have to have forgotten about me by now
My cock is literally on the edge of falling off. Fuck Vegas.
Well. It was around 3 or 4 in the morning. He ran into the woods. Wearing moccasins. Holding an extension cord. He was trying to catch a deer. That about sums up the awesomeness of the night.
It feels like you stuck your dick in a fire and then branded the inside of me.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Immediately after I scarfed down an Applebee's appetizer trio for lunch, my boss sent me on an hour long road trip to pick up some parts. Great. I can't wait to shit my pants on US-31 South.
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
He just seemed to happy to be having sex with me that it ruined the mood for me. I just wanted to punch him.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
You've been inside me, dude. There's no such thing as TMI.
Randomize
