i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
Made a pan flute out of the varyingly empty beer bottles on the table. Played a glorious tune that paid tribute to the winds.
Oh and no more ball pics to my family. Got in a little trouble over that. They have no sense of humor.
Want to FaceTime and watch me finish this bagel?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
have no fear, swaggie olivia is here to bring glorious gifts and horse dick to children
I mean seriously, she can have his dick anytime and im over here salivating like a thirsty bitch.
I've never seen so much of my blood outside me. After the initial shock it was kind of cool.
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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