Do you have swine flu?
I know my taste in men is not always top notch; however, I don't sleep with swine.
Pigs, yes. Swine, no.
Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
I fuked that chick last night and she kept saying, "oh...oh....oh", like Bill Lumberg
so what did you do?
I did the mash I did the monster mash It was a graveyard smash!
Jesus knows you're telling a lie.
Jesus stopped reading my text messages when I started drunk texting boys to hookup
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
We JUST got rid of the new years fatties at my gym and now the spring break fatties are here. goddamn.
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
I had a dream last night that Sam and Dean had to get rid of a murderous ghost haunting an elf on the shelf. I think I'm ready for Christmas to be over.
We need to know if his feet match his cock.
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