is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
There is a large, jolly black gentleman in the parking lot of my appartment complex yelling about 5am jelly doughnuts. I want to be where he's at.
I know. I know. The man who pulled me from my mother's womb was the same man who had his fingers in my vagina today. My life is a joke. I don't know how to feel about this.
Im making gravy in a lace bra and jeans. Just call me the southwern wet dream
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I just rode a horse than walked onto my property in boarshorts, flip flops, and holding a 40. What do I win?
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Is there a nice, calm way of telling your friend/housemate/former lover/person who does not reciprocate your feelings that your period is late?
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
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