he just put it in my mouth and said "go"
Fail #1 I puked off the balcony onto the balcony below us and when I tried to pour water on it in the morning to wash it off it just went all over their deck. Sorry room 1342 but welcome to Jamaica
Don't make me out to be the bad guy. You practically MADE me cum on your food.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
OH AND DAN PET MY CAT WHILE I WAS GIVING HIM HEAD
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
I said "one day" and that day is not today
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
My butthole is tingling. Must be the grapefruit juice
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