Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
If it makes you feel better he went down on me when i had a yeast infection.
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
he just sent me a pic of him naked with a bucket of margarita mix hanging off his dick
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
So that groomsmen was naked under his kilt. Also I just had sex in the elevator. And yes, those two updates are definitely related.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
I just watched two grown men tickle-fight. Just glorious. No words.
Ok because I want to set a new world record for how fast I can drink away my Christmas money
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
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