Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just chased ups truck with a half wiped ass for you. You're making dinner tonight
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
the cab driver asked if you were our mom. you definitely shouldn't have tipped him so much.
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
he cancelled our romantic dinner reservations so we could stay home and watch a Rocky movie marathon and order pizza. i know i should be upset but i think i'm kinda in love.
HOLY SHIT. I JUST FOUND OUT THAT THE KARL/RORY BASEBALL FIGHT THAT RORY LOST WAS 2 YEARS AGO TODAY. RIP KARL'S DICK.
The struggle bus crashed, rolled down a mountain, and went on fire, and I was on it ugh.
He was nothing but deer-caught-in-headlight eyes and dick, it was adorable
You came home screaming the lyrics to Drunk in love, and dumped wine on me when I said you would never be Beyoncé
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I just saw a guy walking up the stairs with his dick out his pants. I let him know, and he just looked down in shock, laughed, and continued walking up the stairs.
Randomize
