we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
It was so good the neighbors even had a cigarette.
Its that time of week again, Bad life decision wednesday
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
You were almost as fucked up as I was the night I hooked up with a bob saget look alike...
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
Ok. I'll enjoy the quiet (translation: I might be naked, call ahead if you come home tonight)
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I got locked into my place today. You might be wondering if that was a typo... It's not.
After this weekend my vagina will follow his penis anywhere. It’s like the pied piper, but with penis
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