if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
What do you wear to apply at a strip club?
They knew I had a party because the refrigerator settings were different, but they don't notice that we installed a new toilet seat so it's okay.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
On a scale of 1 to "bad descision", where does stealing my racist neighbors dog and giving him my roomates dildo for a chew toy rate?
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
Yeah that stuff was rough. We insisted on wearing our bikinis all down college ave, and at several parties that were not beach themed
Yea she is hot. But she also had no toothpaste in her entire apartment.
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