I CAN MOONWALK!
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
heey were did you guys go? last time i remember seeing you i was throwing up in the fountain
we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.
did he notice?
of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
I was naked with an australian flag taped to my boobs. Damn internationals think they can claim everything.
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
my goal for the rest of college is to escape STD free. fuck getting a job. this is more important.
Found this cake smashed up inside a box on the sidewalk. Im saying yes to adventure and eating some.
Taking a nap. Sidewalk cake kicked my ass. It had boston creme filling!
I woke up to the sound of her peeing at the end of the bed at 4am.
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
