the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
she was pretty much dry humping my leg when her boyfriend walked in. he says "you should probably leave." all i could come up with was "YEAH, I KNOW!"
you were on all fours yelling at the earth to stop spinning.
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
Just found out I slapped a vegan in the face with meat last night.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
Srsly this has gone to far. Just broke my nose on the toilet. College bars.
Wow thanks 4 throwing jello at me an yelling who invited that guy to all the guys at the bar
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
She crossed her eyes and threw up into a glass while sitting at the bar. It was fifty shades of sketchy dude.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
6 showers laters and I still feel like I have his vomit in my vagina. At least I could help him figure out he's gay.
I passed out in your bed last night...there maybe a snickers and twix bar under your pillow
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
Randomize
