new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
My entire life is one complicated drinking game
half the nation just spent an hour watching a balloon fly around. we are officially the dumbest fucking country.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
It's not even 8 pm, or Saint Patrick's Day, and Kevin is drunk on my roof humping the air
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
