He told me I remind him of his sister...
Was this before or after you did it?
before... I mean, it's been a long time. I just tried not to think of it during.
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
When he goes down on me, he stares me in the eyes like a shark mocking it's prey as it devours it. Plus, his beard smells like dirty gym socks. This has got to end.
He called me at two in the morning to tell me he was throwing the tiny Thor hammer at moving vehicles. Apparently he missed the guy on the motorcycle.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
I'm serenading his dick with my words. I understand how poets get inspiration now.
I purposely left my thong and accidentally left my ethics book, hairspray and most of my dignity.
last night i was way too drunk and i was forcing people to let me tell them about mammals
Randomize
