I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
I mean its cheating, but i figure i've made out wiht married chicks before so its like a nicotine patch, quitting by doing less and less each day
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Teasing with taco bell is not funny. High or sober.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I just yelled at my mom for getting me circumcised without my permission. That drunk
I did sing regulators with a random black dude at The Rail without looking at the screen, hugged him and walked off stage. I pretty much live up to all expectations.
Need your help. Dad's drunk and trying to build a still in the basement.
NM he's asleep in a pile of towels. They need to ease people back into Hockey Night in Canada.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
Randomize
