and pubic hair rears its ugly head again
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
definition of desperate: He gave me his SC drivers license so i wouldn't forget to facebook him.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
Why would I send you a picture of it when I could just steal the gnome and put it in your bed with you? Admit it, he looks just like gnomeo!
That last minute feeling of hesitation on whether I should bring my health card to the bar usually means I'm in for a good night.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
I keep track of what day of the week it is by my recent destinations on my nav system. \nRight now it's: booty call, bar, booty call, brunch, bar, church so that must mean we are getting close to Sunday when we start the rotation all over again.
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
Randomize