I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
it took everything i had not to yell out "your name means death in german!"
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
i need you to babysit me first week back at school. havent had tequila, adderal, or sex w randoms in 3 months
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
In less than 3 minutes we had 3 security guards running after us
She told me the only rule was that I couldn't cum on her Batman blanket.
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
He walked into the bar with a pillow and put his head down...nuff said
You looked at the bouncer while you pissed on the front door of the bar and said...who the fuck are you?
My professor just told my lab he could drive us around town in his 1991 Lincoln towncar limo for our bar crawl. This just keeps getting better!
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