You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
i want tt clbm rinabw nd ride uncrn
what?
i wnt tto climb a rainboww and ride a unicornnnnnnnnn
Probably, but last night was a special kind of drunk. It was a "let's see how drunk I can get without killing myself" drunk.
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
dude skip the party. it is a fucking post office here
what the hell does that mean?
nothing good but a whole lotta male and packages
I would like to apologize for asking to take advantage of you, wishing you a horny Hanukkah and whatever "abd ethw prnym to mzbe yur penis cna be friends" means.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
asked the girl next to us on line to take a picture of us and she shared her bacardi. i love white people.
You just kept holding your breath for a really long time and calling it lung excersizes.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
Shout out to this stomach virus for helping me prepare for whatever slutty Halloween costume I decide to wear.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
Currently having to re-watch episodes of Lost that I've only partially seen because you distracted me with your vagina
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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