Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
My stomach literally has no contents left. Tequila cleanse=success.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
I'm going to smoke the pathetic stems and miscellaneous particles that weren't good enough for all my other bowls because its all I have left. This is my bag's Rudy moment.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
But we only had three ninja turtles. So everyone that would ask us where Donatello was, we would say "what? He's gone? Shredder is at it again!"
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
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