I don't know what's more sad: The fact that he fingered the side of my leg, or the fact that the side of my leg feels like a vagina.
Try denying you're gay when "I'm Not A Girl, But Not Yet A Woman" comes on Shuffle.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
He was sucking my nipples then stopped, looked me dead in the eyes and said "im gonna cum for my babygirl"
BRING ME THE PLAN B. ILL GIVE YOU A FREE WATER BOTTLE AND A BUMPER STICKER AND SOME BACON BITS
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Randomize
