Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
im keeping my plan b box as a souvenir of my first halloween weekend in college
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
she kept yelling about wanting tacos, so I gave her a piece of bologna in a tortilla. she didn't know the difference
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
So, my love of dick may have landed me in a cult. On the bright side, I now have a discount at Spencer's.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
I lost a fight last night. By that I mean I head butt the bar and busted my lip open.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Randomize
