someone threw a dead crab at me
well i just puked at a family gathering so i can cross that off the bucket list
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
im trying to stop thinking of him and his amazing dick. every time i do i snap myself with a rubber band. classical conditioning at its finest...and you said i wouldnt learn anything from psychology.
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
You would think that me seductively unzipping my cat feetie pajamas would make him want to fuck me.
Old men love us. For they have fine taste and disturbing minds.
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
I just found three upside down bottles of grapejuice in a triangle around the air freshener above my toilet... I guess it was one of those nights
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
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