so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
White boys cant dance....we did an empirical study
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
I SWALLOWED her nuva ring. Please tell me how your night could have been worse.
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Waiting to interview and found a beer in my purse from last night
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
I made him watch the first 5 episodes of Game of Thrones before I decided to sleep with him.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize