i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
It's when I'm in my pajamas and in need of a gin delivery that I miss NYC most of all.
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
My neighbour just came round to ask why we posted a spatula through his door at 3am. What do I tell him??
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
“before I show up tits a blazing, what’s the sexual temperature here?“
Randomize
