Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
i was high and broke so i stole a roast chicken and a 40 inch sheet cake from wegmans and ate in a bathroom stall.
Question. If Kwik Trip and Kum and Go were to merge, what would they call it? Kwik Kum or Kum Kwik?
Well he's in a two year college so technically hes a senior. At least can we just pretend I'm not robbing the cradle.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
could you please tell me why you thought vodka soaked band aids were a good idea?
Her inability to understand the word "moderation" is the achille's heel of an otherwise perfect human
Besides the flaccid incident, it was decent. Average sized. So this is my life now. Loneliness and lackluster sex.
Just made a PowerPoint called "Reasons Why You Should Fuck Me" at his request. The sad thing is we've had sex before...
Just wanted you to know two things, 1st I sent the second thing to a broad ive been talking too. 2nd that was not just a fart.
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I told him finishing at the same time would be a long-term project. Like flipping a house. A sexual house.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
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