I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
I dont know how to respond to your rave picture. I mean yeah, he's hot, but it just seems wrong to be like "Please tell me you fucked that guy with the pacifier!"
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
Dislocated my knee during sex, popped it back in and kept going. Then got simpathy chipotle out of it too.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
The impact your presence has on my vagina without even putting your hands on me is quite astonishing, impressive and a little disturbing.
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I DIDN'T WATCH THE PILLSBURY DOUGH BOY PORN!!!!
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Randomize
