cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
I have funfetti in my underwear...will you come get me?
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
Were you paying girls to come up and grab my cock and tell me I look like bradley Cooper?
When a chinchilla decides to sit on your face while you're getting head from its owner, you bond.
I really just want to stuff him in my purse, take him home, feed him pudding or applesauce and brush his hair. That's not creepy, right?
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I can feel your movements against the shared wall we are leaning up against. It makes me feel as though we are one. Queue Pocahontas song...
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
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