I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
Small penises have feelings too.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
omg my older sister has been googling "how do I know if I've had an orgasm?" and "bj tips". the family laptop is not meant for this...
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
Attn every girl I've slept with in the past 26 years of my life. One of you cunts gave me herpes. This is the 4th of 5 group MMS. That's right. It's in the 50s. There are two girls I don't have #s for. One was on a cruise and the other was a prostitute in Amsterdam. So which of you has herpes?
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
Something about being drunk at 1pm chasing seagulls on the beach while it's raining is very calming
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
Remember that gum I swallowed 3 days ago? I just threw it up.... whole.
Randomize
