did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
Well we ran into the cornfields when the cops got there. We'd been hiding in there for 45 mins when he asks me "So this wasn't exactly how I'd planned this but I thought I'd ask. How do you feel about oral sex?"
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
My roomate just said the he would "tap dat" to the 13 out of control girl on maury. Im finding a new place in the morning.
i spelled "betch" that way on purpose, don't question my abilities as a drunk texter
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
He got violent drunk so we have to untie him in the morning. He's in your basement and you're out of electrical tape. Don't forget because I will.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
Yeah, we got drunk and stole road signs.
Randomize
