Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I passed out on my porch last night. I'm still making it to class. This is what growing up means.
I got Green Bay stickers to put on my nipples. This way when I flash it will look like I did it out of spirit as opposed to drunkenness
Chasing a shot of svedka with a clementine is NOT the same as tequila w lime...
Going home with an argentinian named sulvio. Ill let you know how it goes.
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Is re-gifting a Valentine's Day present worse than re-gifting a Xmas one?
You're unbelievable, unbelievably awesome.
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
my paper on vitamins just turned into a 2 hour tangent google search on what i should buy to best cure a hangover. I need to stop getting high before homework
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
i believe in u and ur pee
Randomize
