how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
I was just at the urinal, started to go, then farted, then said oh yea out loud, then heard someone move in the stall behind me
Yeah I'm pretty sure at one point I was telling her to keep her dick in her pants. She was going to do some serious damage.
hey dude i know youre in the next room but me and your sister need a condom, got any i could borrow?
how are you not completely traumatized after 8 years of friendship with me?
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Dude. If I met a dinosaur right now. we'd totally be on the same page. Brainwaves and shit.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
We fucked. Had a political debate. I won. So I sat on his face.
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I told him I lived in the apartment beside his brother and he said "oh, you're the girl that watches really loud porn!"
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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