Call me immediately, my only recent boy news involves me biting a dick.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
I am the poster child for what not to do during sex. Soon they will be calling an undesired position after me
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I love that my brother has just convinced my dad that smoking a blunt it an "unspoken family tradition"
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
When Pitbull's songs sum up your life... you know it's time for some serious life changes.
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
Randomize
