People with herpes should wear stickers.
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
i'm gonna start putting 34DD under other qualifications on my bartender applications and see if that helps
he then started listing things that have been up his butt, never drinking in boys town again
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
well at that point we were just fucking to keep warm.
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Dude she only counts as your gf if you're home. We both signed the fair game contract when we became roommate. So are you really going to be mad or come eat a waffle with us?
Also I feel that I would be a hell of a sled dog operator.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
The waxing lady fingered me during my brazilian. 40 dollars well spent
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
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