No awkward lesbian experiences without me
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
I am currently in the waffle making stage of highness
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
It's like that depressing moment when you drop your cocaine in the snow.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
One thing noone tells you about getting put in the drunk tank is do it barefoot. You get free flipflops.
Oh I already celebrated valentine's day. I stayed up until 4 AM listening to biggie, drinking rum, and caressing all my girl curves in front of the mirror. And then I came 3 times.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Who has the safety vest from this past weekend Additionally, who has the dancemaster glove?
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Dude did you see that video of yourself crying while bathing in vodka on YouTube?
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
Randomize
