she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
about to tell this girl that sh'es my teenage dream. you have 15.358s to stop me.
I remember your 21st ending with me driving you home while you insisted making bicycle signals out the car window.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
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