i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
Dude. There's gotta be an article in Cosmo about it cause I've had three different girls tongue tickle my brownie this month.
If i ever die cab you make sure bag pipes are at my funeral they are awsome
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
Well I only snuggle him I don't hump him. That's rude.
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize
