playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
woke up and her hair clip was clamped around my shaft
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
I've decided I'm just gonna keep drinking til the baby bump shows...
Don't you hate it when all three people suddenly sober up in the middle of a threesome. Awwwwkward.
I noticed a trail of vomit coming up the drive way. You must be home
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
I was riding him and in the middle he literally said "fuck yeah, Amy Winehouse"
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
Idk you're asking me for advice on dating bro, after I told you I got a convicts number today.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
i feel like if my pee,blood, or vomit is on it...it should belong to me by default. can we make that a rule?
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
Randomize
