I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
Hahaha I don't remember taking it away. But no one should have a sledgehammer at a party. NO ONE.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
2:23 am. Im just at McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, paying in nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
2:26 am. Im just being thrown out of McDonalds, in my pajamas, at 2 am, without my nickles, cuz thats how i roll.
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
He keeps bees of course he's weird
Idk dude I just feel kinda weird masturbating in my Obama Biden 2008 shirt...
No. DON'T DO IT. Friends don't let friends fuck clowns.
why did you put a dildo on the ceiling fan
the dildo had a suction cup and we had a ceiling fan what did you expect?
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
Randomize
