4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Not everyone can get ass. Some people are good at building rockets. You’re good at sleeping with many men. It’s an art.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I imagine anything that isn't a dilldo attached to a jackhammer, powered by a generator won't be amazing enough for you
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
This escort grabbed my boyfriends ass and it became clear, he fucked pretty much anything he could find prior to dating me.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Do you ever feel like your dog agrees with you? Like REALLY really agrees.
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
At least they play good movies in the waiting room of the pregnancy resource center.
Ive never seen a drunk man get suplexed before last week, now its the standard requirement every time we go out.
I wasnt 2 drunk i sobered up around the time we were shooting the fire extinguishers
Randomize
